Blessed are the Trailer Trash
As you probably know, the Beatitudes were eight blessings
given at the beginning of the Sermon on the Mount. These were
beautiful and inspirational blessings, intended to overcome
prejudices of the time. However, we can think of other blessings
that are representative of today's needs.
One of the groups that is most stigmatized these days is
southern mobile home dwellers, fondly known as "trailer
trash." Since there were no mobile homes in the olden days,
no specific mention was made of this sub-culture. However,
we feel that they are greatly in need of being blessed. - so we
added a few blessings of our own, just to be sure that all
possibilities are covered:
Blessed are those who have house trailers, "mobile
homes," or "manufactured housing," for they shall
be called trailer trash.
Blessed are the trailer trash, for they shall have doublewide
estates in heaven.
Blessed are those in rural and remote areas, for mobile homes
Blessed are those with bad credit, for they can get a
personal property loan.
Blessed are those with doublewide units, for they paid twice
the price of single wide.
Blessed are the poor, for they pay the highest loan
Blessed are the clean of heart, for 80% own their own mobile
homes instead of renting.
Blessed are those with low monthly payments, for they
pay extra to rent a home site.
Blessed are those who live in singlewide units, for they go
to the bathroom and meet themselves coming back.
Blessed are they who live in the southeast, for 15% of homes
are manufactured housing.
Blessed are they who sit down too hard on the couch, for they
may cause the house to tilt.
Blessed are they who cannot move their possessions without
moving their entire house.
Blessed are those who sell at a loss, because mobile
homes are not really mobile.
Blessed are they who hunger and thirst, for there is no pizza
delivery in the trailer park.
Blessed are "modular" homeowners, for they are
trailer trash without wheels.
Blessed are they who donít pay real estate taxes, for they
pay personal property tax instead.
Blessed are they who have no back doors, for they have more
space for bumper stickers.
Blessed are they who are trailer trash, for they shall be
called the children of HUD.
Blessed are they who can turn on the hair blower and vacuum
the entire house.
Blessed are they whose homes depreciate in value, for they
will build no equity.
Blessed are those who have chassis and wheels, for they shall
forever be trailer trash.
Blessed are the trailer trash, for manufactured
homes are not going away.