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Meet the Columnist

Columnist, Sheila Moss, is humor writer from  Tennessee. She writes  a weekly human interest column about daily life and the funny things that happen to everyone.

   She has written for  the Daily News of Kingsport,   Griffin Journal, Oakridge Now, Atlanta Woman Magazine, Aberdeen Examiner, Angleton Advocate,  and Smyrna AM, a supplement of the Murfreesboro Daily News Journal. She has been published by Voyageur Press, McGraw Hill, and the good folks at Guidepost Books.  Her articles have appeared in numerous anthologies and other publications, both in print and online.

    She is a former board member and past  Editor of  the Columnists.com, website of  the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, the oldest and largest professional organization for columnists. She is the Web Editor of Southern
Humorists.com
  and  a founder of the Southern Humorists writers' organization. She is writer, editor, and webmaster of HumorColumnist.com

    To carry her weekly column in your newspaper, or to republish an article, please contact her. It's that easy. 

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Are You a Nerd?...
 


Are You a Nerd?

If you would rather reprogram the VCR than watch football,

You might be a nerd.

If you own more than one digital camera,

You might be a nerd.

If you buy refills for your ballpoint pen,

You might be a nerd.

If you spent your vacation at a computer show and convention,

You might be a nerd.

If this was the most exciting vacation you’ve ever had,

You might be a nerd.

If you sometimes forget to leave work at quitting time,

You might be a nerd.

If your tie and socks match,

You might be a nerd.

If you understand your palm pilot better than you understand people,

You might be a nerd.

If you have a spare pair of horn-rimmed glasses,

You might be a nerd.

If you have more than one home computer and all of them work,

You might be a nerd.

If you ever spell check your "to do" list.

You might be a nerd.

If you sleep with a pocket calculator in your pajama pocket,

You might be a nerd.

If you save your brown paper lunch bag and reuse it,

You might be a nerd.

If you work for the government, an accounting firm, or a bank,

You might be a nerd.

You think accuracy is more important than speed, 

You might be a nerd.

If you keep spare batteries for your flashlight,

You might be a nerd.

If you subscribe to a crossword puzzle magazine,

You might be a nerd.

If your favorite TV program is the Weather Channel,

You might be a nerd.

If you wear your work ID card at home.

You might be a nerd.

If you have any friends that are auditors, programmers, or embezzlers,

You might be a nerd.

If you always remember to floss when you brush,

You might be a nerd.

If you understand the metric system, quantum mechanics, and HTML,

You might be a nerd.

You have 25 electronic gadgets and actually know how to work them all,

You might be a nerd.

If you have a picture of your mother on your desk,

You might be a nerd.

If you are allergic to cats, plants, mold, dust, and latex,

You might be a nerd.

If you ever wear brown shoes with black pants,

You might be a nerd.

If your emergency supplies include a glare screen and a tiny screwdriver, 

You might be a nerd.

If other nerds envy your taste in pocket protectors,

Might as well admit it, you're a nerd!


Copyright 2002 Sheila Moss
 
 



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