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Meet the Columnist

Columnist, Sheila Moss, is humor writer from  Tennessee. She writes  a weekly human interest column about daily life and the funny things that happen to everyone.

   She has written for  the Daily News of Kingsport,   Griffin Journal, Oakridge Now, Atlanta Woman Magazine, Aberdeen Examiner, Angleton Advocate,  and Smyrna AM, a supplement of the Murfreesboro Daily News Journal. She has been published by Voyageur Press, McGraw Hill, and the good folks at Guidepost Books.  Her articles have appeared in numerous anthologies and other publications, both in print and online.

    She is a former board member and past  Editor of  the Columnists.com, website of  the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, the oldest and largest professional organization for columnists. She is the Web Editor of Southern
Humorists.com
  and  a founder of the Southern Humorists writers' organization. She is writer, editor, and webmaster of HumorColumnist.com

    To carry her weekly column in your newspaper, or to republish an article, please contact her. It's that easy. 

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Love It or List It....
 


Love It or List It


My daughter recorded a bunch of TV shows for me to watch that she thought I might like. One of the shows with multiple episodes was called "Love It or List It." A real estate agent tries to find a new dream home within a budget and persuade a couple to move while a decorator completely remodels their old home to entice them to stay.

After watching a dozen episodes, I began to notice all the things wrong with my home that needed changing in order for me to love it. I am totally out of style in my 25 year old house. Oh, I've done a few upgrades, for example, stainless steel appliances only because my old ones died one by one and had to be replaced.

Still, I found out by watching TV that I really need other things that were on the list of every single couple. For example, did you know that open concept kitchens are now in? Open concept means, the kitchen, eating area and living room are combined. I am so outdated that there is probably no hope. But the more shows I saw, the more I wanted change, so I decided to do a few little things.

Obviously, the wall between the living room and kitchen must go at my place. I made quite a mess with the chainsaw and forgot about not taking out supporting walls, but the living room and kitchen are now open concept, great for entertaining.

Did you know that you must have granite countertops in your kitchen now, or even better, quartz? My butcher block that used to be so stylish is now out. It was hard getting the counter tops off, even with a crowbar, but I managed.

Of course, I really need a work island in the middle of the kitchen. Everyone who is anyone has an island. But where will I put it? I will have to get rid of the table to make room. I know, I will add a sunroom and put the table out there. As soon as the contractor arrives, I will get started.

As long as I am adding granite countertops, I might as well fix up the bathrooms too. Sharing a bathroom is in, but sharing a lavatory is out. Double sinks are the current trend, his and hers. It will look great with a couple of those fancy bowls and a soaker tub. We must have a soaker tub. Did I mention shower jets and a glass enclosure? Those too.

While I'm waiting for the plumber, I think I will do something about the man cave in my living room. That oversized entertainment center is a relic. What is in now is a flat screen over the fireplace. I'll just put it and the TV on Craigslist and see if I can get rid of it. We will need to get a new TV pretty quickly, though, so I don't miss any episodes of "Love It or List It."

That should about take care of the problem except for French doors to new sunroom. Sliding doors are out, French doors are in. I don't have a sliding door, but I can knock out a window or two. No problem.

That's about all I can think of for now. I didn't get to the attic, and that is unused space that could be utilized to expand the living space, according to the HGTV home designer. Maybe we could raise the ceiling and put in a skylight, very chic look.

In case you are wondering, no, I did not actually do any of this except in my imagination. I guess I will continue to live in an old-fashioned house with a kitchen wall. At least no one can see the dirty dishes in the sink.

And if I win the lottery, I'm ready.


Copyright 2014 Sheila Moss
 
 



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