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Meet the Columnist

Columnist, Sheila Moss, is humor writer from  Tennessee. She writes  a weekly human interest column about daily life and the funny things that happen to everyone.

   She has written for  the Daily News of Kingsport,   Griffin Journal, Oakridge Now, Atlanta Woman Magazine, Aberdeen Examiner, Angleton Advocate,  and Smyrna AM, a supplement of the Murfreesboro Daily News Journal. She has been published by Voyageur Press, McGraw Hill, and the good folks at Guidepost Books.  Her articles have appeared in numerous anthologies and other publications, both in print and online.

    She is a former board member and past  Editor of  the Columnists.com, website of  the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, the oldest and largest professional organization for columnists. She is the Web Editor of Southern
Humorists.com
  and  a founder of the Southern Humorists writers' organization. She is writer, editor, and webmaster of HumorColumnist.com

    To carry her weekly column in your newspaper, or to republish an article, please contact her. It's that easy. 

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Kate & William Show...
 


The Kate and William Show

Here it is the day after the royal wedding, the royal couple is on their royal honeymoon, and I'm still waiting for my royal invitation which undoubtedly was lost in the royal mail. It doesn't really matter, though, I didn't have a hat big enough or ugly enough to wear anyhow.

On second thought, maybe I did. My sister and I found a hat box in my mother's closet with some from the fifties that are pretty bad. They might rival those monstrosities on the heads of the English ladies. Oh, well, too late now. We will have to save them for the next royal wedding or a luncheon of the ladies' Red Hat Society.

Did you get up early to watch the nuptials on TV? Me neither. I was really shocked at the number of people who said they did, though. For some reason, people are still fascinated by a "once upon a time" wedding, complete with royal carriage, obviously only recently changed from a pumpkin into a vehicle by a fairy godmother lurking behind a bush somewhere.

I must admit, they did make a lovely couple, he in his red military jacket with gold braid, she in her much-discussed, white gown and veil with diamond tiara borrowed from the queen. It was a fairy-tale wedding in spite of the fact that they have already lived together for eight years. Is that called a fairy tale or a Hollywood gossip column? Obviously, times have changed.

The fashion critics were foaming at the mouth to see the wedding gown. It looked pretty much like any other wedding gown to me, yards and yards of lace and flowing white material, with a train so long someone had to help carry it so the bride could walk. Even as vows were exchanged, fashion designers went into overdrive creating fabulous knock-offs, arriving soon in a bridal shop near
you.

And how did you like the queen's outfit? I guess queens don't wear crowns anymore, or at least not to grandson's weddings. No crown, no cape, no nothing. She just looked like everyone else, or maybe a bit like a royal canary in a yellow outfit complete with the mandatory yellow hat. How could anyone not think of Big Bird?

When my grandchildren were playing with Barbie dolls later, I thought they surely would have material for hours of re-enactment of the Kate and William show. Somehow, they still seem to prefer Prince Charming and Cinderella. Real life princes and princesses just don't get the respect they once did.

There is always talk of doing away with royalty in Britain because of the cost to the taxpayers of maintaining them. Somehow the Brits never get around to it. They simply adore all the pageantry that surrounds the royalty and the spectacle of the filthy rich flaunting their wealth.

This is the first really big wedding extravaganza since Charles and Diana were married. That one didn't end too well with the divorce, scandal, and eventual death of Diana, who died in a car accident with her then current lover. Charles ultimately married his mistress Camille and brought her to the wedding to be arrogantly snubbed by his mother, the queen.

After the honeymoon, the couple will live happily ever after in Whales, or at least for the time being. The British will have a new royal couple to give birth to a new generation of princes and princes  to be chased by the paparazzi.

So, I suppose I might as well give up on my over-due wedding invitation and just watch wedding reruns on television like the rest of us common people.


Copyright 2011 Sheila Moss

 
 



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