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Meet the Columnist

Columnist, Sheila Moss, is humor writer from  Tennessee. She writes  a weekly human interest column about daily life and the funny things that happen to everyone.

   She has written for  the Daily News of Kingsport,   Griffin Journal, Oakridge Now, Atlanta Woman Magazine, Aberdeen Examiner, Angleton Advocate,  and Smyrna AM, a supplement of the Murfreesboro Daily News Journal. She has been published by Voyageur Press, McGraw Hill, and the good folks at Guidepost Books.  Her articles have appeared in numerous anthologies and other publications, both in print and online.

    She is a former board member and past  Editor of  the Columnists.com, website of  the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, the oldest and largest professional organization for columnists. She is the Web Editor of Southern
Humorists.com
  and  a founder of the Southern Humorists writers' organization. She is writer, editor, and webmaster of HumorColumnist.com

    To carry her weekly column in your newspaper, or to republish an article, please contact her. It's that easy. 

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Fourth of July....
 


Fourth of July


Every year about this time the fireworks tents begin to sprout out by the county line, and I know its almost here again - the 4th of July. As usual, I'm sitting around trying to decide the best way to spend the holiday. 

This year things seem to boil down pretty much to three choices: a big public gathering, a gathering of friends at the park for a picnic, or a small family-type celebration.

The large public gatherings must be the best. They sure seem to attract plenty of people. The fireworks displays are large and loud. They usually have fantastic food - fantastically overpriced; beer - fantastically over consumed; and traffic jams - fantastically frustrating. 

If I didn't mind rubbing elbows with sweaty crowds and had plenty of money to waste, this might be a fun way to celebrate. Who knows, I might even be lucky enough to find a place to park without walking several miles from a parking lot.

Celebrating with friends seems like pleasant alternative. A quite day at the park with picnic food, lawn chairs, children, laughing, playing… becoming overly tired… obnoxious, whining children… fighting… arguing - flies buzzing around my delicious potato salad that has been sitting out for hours and is probably full of food poisoning. Serve those flies right if they get botulism. 

Of course, there will be all sorts of fun things to do - softball, volleyball… in the hot, oppressive July weather. If the sunburn isn't too bad, we might even get away in time to see the local fireworks. If traffic is the usual, we can watch them from the Interstate again this year!

Last but not least, there is the thought of simply staying at home and celebrating with family. My family is always happy to come by where there is free food. Let's see, I will only need to start cooking a day or two ahead to get ready. Maybe we can barbecue, that's easy. Of course, the grill will have to be cleaned. 

Gee, wonder if I need to check the propane on that gas grill.. hate to run out. The lawn needs to be mowed, and the lawn furniture hasn't been cleaned this year. Boy, it sure is great to have a holiday so I can rest!

Of course, the family will probably come late, eat and run. They have to hurry to make it to fireworks. I can stay home and protect the roof from the bottle rockets the neighborhood kids are shooting and calm down the dog, who is terrified by the firecrackers.

What fun! Gee, I love a holiday! Sure hope it doesn't rain!


Copyright 1998 Sheila Moss
 
 



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