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Meet the
Columnist
Columnist, Sheila
Moss, is a free-lance writer from Tennessee. She writes
funny stuff about southern life, women's issues, family
matters and anything else that she finds amusing.
She is
seen weekly in the Daily News of Kingsport and Hill
Country Times and
appears in a monthly humor publication called Foolish
Times. She has written for Atlanta Woman Magazine, Aberdeen Examiner,
Angleton
Advocate, and Smyrna AM, a supplement of the Murfreesboro Daily News
Journal. She has been
published by Voyageur Press, McGraw Hill, and the good folks
at Guidepost Books have recently published a number of her
articles in their Let There Be Laughter series of
books. Her articles have appeared in
numerous other publications, both print and online.
She is a board member and the Web
Editor of Columnists.com, website of the National Society of Newspaper
Columnists, the
oldest and largest professional organization
for news columnists. She is also the Web Editor of
SouthernHumorists.com as well as this website, HumorColumnist.com.
To carry her self- syndicated weekly column in your
newspaper, or
to republish an
article, please contact her. It's that easy.
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National
Society of
Newspaper Columnists
HumorColumnist.com
Online Since 1999

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No Ice.... |
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No Ice
My
refrigerator is ancient relic from pre historic times, but it works just
fine. The icemaker, however, has been on the blink for quite some time
now. Oh, it makes ice just fine: the water kicks on with a little
whirring sound; the purr of the ice maker motor is heard, and the crash
of ice cubes being dumped into the bin echoes in the freezer
compartment.
Yes, it makes ice just fine, but it also leaks. Water runs down into the
bin where the ice cubes are and freezes. Soon, instead of individual ice
cubes, I have one large block of ice.
I have become accustomed to not having any ice except maybe a few cubes
that have not yet frozen together. It is annoying, but why have it
fixed? How much longer can the old refrigerator last?
I have already been scoping out the new ones, the stainless steel models
at over a thousand bucks, the phony stainless steel ones, and the black
ones that match the dishwasher that I bought a few years ago. The prices
make me dizzy.
I periodically remove the block of ice and put it into the sink to melt
while the old icemaker tries to make new ice faster than the leak can
freeze cubes together.
A person can only go without ice for so long. Oh, sure, I could buy ice
or make it in ice trays, but I've been spoiled like the rest of the
world. I want an icemaker!
I finally become disgusted with the whole mess. "I'm getting that
thing fixed regardless of how old the fridge is," I decide. I check
the yellow pages. "We fix all makes and models," the ad says.
So, I call. He will come tomorrow.
I need a new icemaker the repairman determines the next day. What a
surprise. However, it seems that nothing can be fixed in one trip these
days. He makes an appointment to come back next Monday. I won't be here,
but my daughter will -- I believe.
When I get home from work on Monday, the repairman's card is in the
door. My daughter had car trouble, and wasn't here when he came. No
icemaker. I call and apologize and ask him to come back on Friday. He
agrees.
Friday comes and I wait and wait, but no repairman. "He is getting
even with me for not being here when he came before," I think to
myself.
I call, but get no answer, so I leave a message and continue waiting. I
wait until noon and call again. The line is busy. I wait another 10
minutes and call again. This time he answers. Ah, ha! I've got him now!
"This is Ms. Moss," I explain. "It is after noon and you
said you would be here in the morning."
"Oh, yeah, I forgot about you. I'll be there in about 30
minutes." He forgot? What a professional! I am beginning to
wonder if he even knows how to fix refrigerators.
An hour later he finally shows up at the door with a new icemaker. He
tracks some kind of black stuff all over the kitchen floor and tells me
about his problems with online banking while working. He finally
finishes, charges me an arm and a leg, and leaves.
At least the icemaker is finally fixed. The refrigerator is still as
ugly as ever, but it runs like new. I have more ice than I know what to
do with. The ice bin is full and overflowing. I practically own a
glacier.
I've been thinking that I could get the fridge sprayed black and it
would look brand new. But, why bother? I don't know how, but I know -- I
just know -- that since I've spent all that money to fix the icemaker,
the refrigerator is bound to conk out any day now.
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Copyright 2006 Sheila Moss
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Sheila Moss
PO Box 198019
Nashville, TN 37219
E-Mail

Seen In

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