Case of the Curly Cut
Ladies, Iím talking to you here. Men, just put your
fingers in your ears while we ladies have a chat.
Men just do not understand the problems we ladies have
with our hair, do they? Oh sure, guys have their bad hair days, but
chances are they will just slick it down and go on. Ladies, however,
are supposed to look beautiful. Our hair is our crowning glory. When
our crowning glory refuses to cooperate, it becomes a disaster that
can ruin your life, or at least a day of it.
Now, here is my problem. The other week I decided to
get a haircut. My hair has always been thick and fast growing Ė in
other words, BIG hair. I have a favorite hairdresser that I always go
to who always cuts my hair the same. Unlike most of them, she
doesnít think "the shorter the better" and try to cut it
This time I decided that I would go to someone
different for a change, someone more convenient to where I live. You
ladies already know what Iím going to say, donít you? Yes, she
tried to cut it all off!
"Your hair is really long! How much do you want
"Just a trim." They always cut three times
as much as you tell them to.
"It is really out of shape! Want me to shape it
up for you?"
Well, sure, I donít want my hair to be out of shape,
"Do you want me to layer it a little bit?"
It is really long on top. It is going to be flat if it isnít
Well, sure, I donít want to be flat on top, do I?
So, scissors snip and hair falls as I watch in horror!
Soon I am up to my chin in clippings. In practically no time at all,
itís all over. I open my eyes.
"Doesnít it look great?" she says,
fluffing and fixing.
"Yikes!" Who is that person in the mirror?
She is nearly bald! My big hair is merely a distant memory now. I
repress the urge to sweep my mane up off the floor and try to put it
"You could wear it curly," says the hair
guru. "Just moose it and scrunch it like this!" She bends
over and demonstrates the scrunch technique.
"My hair has always been straight, unless it is
permed." I say, looking around desperately for the nearest exit.
I feel a little lightheaded. Is it merely the absence
of the excess weight of my big hair? I pay the ransom and leave,
wondering how long it will take for my beautiful tresses to grow back.
I canít believe I paid someone to scalp me.
At home my hair refuses to cooperate. It tries to
curl. Why is my hair curling? It has always been straight. At first I
try to pull it around curlers, but it is so short it wonít stay.
Finally, I give up and decide to give the curly routine a try. It is
the weirdest thing. It curls just like a perm. What did she do to my
"I like your new perm," say the girls at
"I donít have a perm!"
"Oh sure, wink, wink," they laugh.
Itís true! My hair has suddenly become curly, after
a lifetime of being straight. It makes no sense at all. What a
mystery. How can hair change completely all on itís own just from a
Iím starting to get used to it now. Maybe I just
wasnít ready for such a drastic change. Just call me
"Curly" - or "Frizzy." I promise, if it ever grows
back, Iíll never complain about my big hair again!