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Meet the Columnist

Columnist, Sheila Moss, is humor writer from  Tennessee. She writes  a weekly human interest column about daily life and the funny things that happen to everyone.

   She has written for  the Daily News of Kingsport,   Griffin Journal, Oakridge Now, Atlanta Woman Magazine, Aberdeen Examiner, Angleton Advocate,  and Smyrna AM, a supplement of the Murfreesboro Daily News Journal. She has been published by Voyageur Press, McGraw Hill, and the good folks at Guidepost Books.  Her articles have appeared in numerous anthologies and other publications, both in print and online.

    She is a former board member and past  Editor of  the Columnists.com, website of  the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, the oldest and largest professional organization for columnists. She is the Web Editor of Southern
Humorists.com
  and  a founder of the Southern Humorists writers' organization. She is writer, editor, and webmaster of HumorColumnist.com

    To carry her weekly column in your newspaper, or to republish an article, please contact her. It's that easy. 

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The Blue Angels...
 


Wild, Blue, Yonder

They cameÖ they flewÖ theyíre gone!

After five long years, they finally brought back the airshow! Iíve missed it since it was canceled shortly after 9/11. I donít know where itís been or why it took so long. I only know itís back, and like all the other fans
around here, I couldnít be happier.

I didnít have an inkling until I saw the flashing sign on the highway, AIRSHOW. We whizzed by it, but I was sure it said airshow. I rushed to the computer when I got home to Google ďairshowĒ. Yep, there it was in black
and white, or electronic letters Ė whatever.

I used to have my own little set of rules on how to go to an airshow. It must have been too long since Iíve been to one, because I didnít obey my own rules too well.

Rule One is get your tickets early and save five bucks per ticket. Problem was, I couldnít figure out where to get them, some bank Iíd never heard of. Once again, I was saved by the Internet and found it was in a grocery store. But I got there late and had to stand in line for 30 minutes. Fifty thousand people going to an airshow and one person selling tickets. No wonder people just get tickets at the gate.

Rule Two is go early to stake your claim on a good spot up front. We overslept. I didnít have anything ready. I had to dig through the garage to find lawn chairs and then dust off spider webs.

Rule Three is take your own food because they charge $3 for a bottle of water. I didnít have anything to take, so I just grabbed up what I could find, water, apples, and diet soda. It wasnít enough for an entire day.

We had to wait in another long line to park. They didnít seem as organized as they used to be. I guess it had been a long time for them too. By the time we got in and dragged our chairs a mile across the parking lot, all hope of a spot anywhere close to the front line was gone.

I noticed that we were hopelessly out of fashion with our heavy folding lawn chairs. Everyone else had the collapsible kind with its own portable tote bags. Two out of our four were broken, so we had to be careful how we sat on them. Lawn chair upgrades were sorely needed.

Rule Four is to take sunscreen and sunhats. I did remember that, thank goodness! I couldnít find my airshow hat with the small brim and had to wear my fishing hat, but it was a hat. I used sunscreen, but I forgot about my feet. Who would expect feet to get sunburned?

The flying was just as fabulous as in all other years as the show unfolded against a clear blue sky. There were loops, spirals, Cuban eights, near passes, bombs, synchronized acrobatics and other thrilling demonstrations of manís artful mastery of the air.

I wonder what it is about an air show that captures the imagination and holds thousands spellbound as they watch the various aerial feats. Probably something as basic as manís discovery of the airplane itself, the dream of escaping our earthbound existence and flying like the birds.

It has to be something inexplicable to get people to sit in the hot sun for five hours looking up. But it was a first-rate show, even though I still have sunburned feet.

Iím already thinking about next year. I saw those portable lawn chairs on sale! And my grandson, who attended for the first time, would like to add his idea, ďNext time, letís get an umbrella.Ē Sounds like a plan to me.

And, if it isnít too much trouble, let us know about it a bit sooner next time!



Copyright 2005 Sheila Moss
 
 



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